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Baby Matters

Off to School

September 1st, 20161 Comment

By Delaine Dew

I have never really been the biggest fan of September – that friendly foe who brings colder weather, falling leaves and of course, back to school.  You can almost smell it in the air – that fall, back to school scent that encourages you, reluctantly, to put away the summer toys, patio furniture, flip flops and garden tools.

It has been many years since I have actually had to go back to school, but I am just beginning my “back to school” journey as a mom with a little girl who is starting preschool, and I’m not quite sure how I feel about it yet.

On the one hand, I am so proud of my daughter, now 3, for entering preschool and beginning down the long road of education ahead of her, and on the other hand, I am so sad that these younger years are just slipping through my fingers like the handful of hot sand you picked up at the beach during summer.

As a happy mom of one, with no intentions of having any more children, I have had to say goodbye to a lot of “baby stages” that I will not experience again, and it’s sometimes difficult to wrap my head around it.  Long gone are the bottles and soothers; long gone are the high chairs, diapers and mushy food.  My little girl is much more independent and definitely does not need my help as much anymore – and I am often told, “mommy I can do it all by myself.”  This both makes me beam with pride and wince in sadness as my little baby is growing up and becoming a little pre-schooler.

It’s so hard to concede that after so many years of dreaming of becoming a mom, being that mom and taking care of a precious baby, it all goes by in such a flash and before you know it, your little baby is in pre-school and those baby days are gone forever.  It’s so hard to think that school will occupy such a large chunk of your child’s time and you hope in your heart of hearts that school, and all that comes with it, will be kind to your child.

Nothing makes me more thrilled than seeing my daughter become her own little person, with her own ideas and personality and thoughts about the world – and questions about the world, oh the questions!  She is at the incredible inquisitive stage where she wants to know everything – “why do we have ears?”, “why do we have to obey the law?”, “why can’t we go in construction sites?”, “what would happen if we didn’t have bones?”  I only hope that I have answered these questions correctly – after all, it has been a really long time since I was in school…

However, I still cherish the quiet times with my little girl.  The times where you truly see your little baby looking up at you, and the cuddles and kisses still showered upon you.  One of my favourite things to do still is to cuddle with her in her old, creaky rocking chair before bed, talking about our day, and telling each other that we love each other more than anything in the whole world and beyond.  I don’t want these days to end, and I hope they never do, but I can’t imagine a 16-year-old girl wanting to cuddle with her mom in a rocking chair before bed, and it makes me sad that I don’t have too many “little girl” years left.  I truly cherish the everyday moments with her and try to steal each feeling, sound and smell and lock them away in a special place in my memory – I will always have that.

So, September, you can arrive in full force and effect and my little girl and I will be ready.  My daughter will be off to preschool, and I will become the proud mom of a little girl who has started school.  And although I am so delighted she has reached this point of “little girlhood”, I will always embrace the quiet times with my baby.

Delaine is a mom to a beautiful, active and insightful little girl, and also stays busy as a wife and full-time lawyer in Edmonton. She enjoys running, reading, writing, watching bad TV with her husband and most importantly, being a mom.


Tags: Babies, Humour, Moms

Reader Comments (1)

Sam said on December 12, 2016

Thanks for sharing this Delaine. My wife and I just went through this journey with our daughter and it's a bit of a catch 22 like you said. On one hand, we are excited to see her grow, but on the other hand, we want our little baby back... I own a local carpet cleaning company so am usually out and about. But we are lucky that my wife is a stay at home mom so she will be able to spend some time with our daughter volunteering at her pre-school. Thanks for sharing and all the best. Sam

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